I have been trying for weeks to come up with a perfect topic to write about, and every night I do my best to come up with one with no success. As I was lying in bed trying to fall asleep it finally came to me, fat people, especially fat men do not like it when someone comes up to them, pats them on the back and says “How’s it going big guy?” Actually this doesn’t really apply to women. I don’t think anyone has ever said to a fat woman “How’s it going large lady?” Or “hey there big gal!” or “How you doing broad-backed babe?” (If I’m wrong ladies please let me know.) I have heard lots of times people calling my husband, brother, and father “Big Guy.”
I’m not sure when it was decided “Big Guy” was an appropriate way to greet someone, but I’m pretty positive fat guys don’t like it. No one likes to have pointed out they are big even if it is true. This greeting is usually done by a guy who is not big which makes it worse. Like I have stated before, it is okay for fat people to make fun of themselves and other fat people like them, but is not okay for skinny people to do it. The problem comes in the fact that the person doing the greeting doesn’t think he is being offensive to the fat guy. I think the skinny guy thinks he is being nice and doing the fat guy a favor by saying hello to him and giving the fat guy a nickname.
The other part of this greeting a fat guy doesn’t like is being patted. For some reason my husband is always getting patted on the back, arm or shoulder. I understand these parts of my husband’s body are large, but that does not mean they are meant to be a bull’s eye for everyone to pat. Fat people including women on this one generally don’t like to be patted. It causes the fat to jiggle and can be felt by the fat person as well as the non-fat person doing the patting. Often seeing the sight of a person coming toward a fat person with his or her hand in the position of a tennis racket ready to strike a ball, causes the fat person to become tense waiting for the smack this then makes the whole greeting uncomfortable making the fat person seem anti-social, which then causes the patting, big guy-calling greeter to quickly say “Well, I’ll catch you later.” The greeter tends to think, “Ah that was so nice of me to say hello to that poor awkward, fat person,” and the fat guy tends to feel as though he has just been molested and insulted. If you are a skinny guy reading this and have been guilty of greeting fat people in this way, just keep in mind, jiggling a person and pointing out to a person they are big is not an appropriate way to say hello. Try a hand shake and using the person’s name next time.
How about losing some weight? I can’t stand fat people who whine and complain about being fat, all the while eating Oreos and bacon instead of running a few miles on the treadmill.
Dear “Me”,
Who’s complaining about being fat? I’m complaining about people touching me because I’m fat. It would be the same as me tapping someone who’s African American and saying “Hey there black guy!” or patting a little person on their head and saying “Hey there shorty!” You just don’t do that. We are very aware that we are fat and we are NOT complaining about being fat. We are just pointing out the things in life that fat people do not like. Just as I’m sure there are things a fit person like yourself might not like, such as fat people. If you would like to write about things you don’t like you are free to do so. Maybe if you lay off the juice you’ll be able to control your rage…by the way…bacon is good, and if you’re going to eat Oreo’s make sure they are the Double Stuff. But never…never eat bacon and Oreo’s together. That’s just not right.
i looked through all these blogs and there all things you hate about being fat. Doesn’t this at all motivate you to lose weight so you don’t have to deal with these problems???
People make choices. Every choice we make in life have advantages and disadvantages. Correct me if I’m wrong, but I think this blog discusses the disadvantages?
Dear “Me” and John, let’s just say that I am sure you’ve made choices in your life that you gripe about.
Exactly Virgomonkey!
This site is all about gripes. Nothing here is really so severe that it would really change my lifestyle and eating habits. I’m not going to join a gym so I can sit in a papasan chair, or not get called “big guy” but I can talk about it. Maybe someday something will be the straw that breaks the camel’s back… not that I could ever sit on a camel, but I think you know what I mean. I’m sure there are things everyone complains about and if you can’t talk about and laugh at the little crap that ticks you off you’ll go nuts.
Well, I’ve never been patted (except by an aunt who has trouble with boundaries) but I did have a total stranger greet me with, “Hey, big pretty girl. . . .” It wasn’t an appropriate opener, but I kinda liked it. I guess because most of the time I feel like my size makes me invisible.
This patting reminds me of the urge to touch the baby bump of a pregnant woman. I really believe both actions are instinctive. In the case of patting a big guy, it just may be that the patter is sizing up the guy, checking how much fat to muscle is present (fitness maybe?), muscular guys are always being patted aswell, see any body builder.
The baby bump scenario is very common and im pretty sure it is linked to early family/communal environments in our ancestors. Those patting the bump would be displaying there relationship to mother and child, in this case indicating that they pose no threat.
Interesting post.
FATY
lol I’ve had a stranger come up and hug me and say “Hey big gal” before… so it has happened…tho… I felt like slapping him for hugging me… I hate people invading my space
So I read this article shortly after I started a policy of returning the favor. There are already a couple of serial backslappers that seem put off when I’m approaching and are starting to get the idea that it is an unwelcome interruption to have your shoulder stimulated in this manner.
Not sure if this applies but I work with headphones and I find headphone snappers that pull the earpiece off and allow it to snap back to your head, or people who remove your headphones for you, so they can say something are a particular sore point for me.
I’m 279 and working on it, not because of these basic indignities but because I recognize the health risks associated with living the plus sized life style and I chose to do something about it.
I just posted about this on my blog a few weeks ago and yes most big guys don’t like being called big guy, but they shouldn’t be upset by it. If being called big guy bothers you then you should try to drop the weight. I’m a big guy and I got tired of being call big anything so I have changed my diet and have already lost about 50 pounds. I say make your haters your motivators
I totally agree with this. Ever since I was a chubby little kid I’ve been greeted by people as “Big Guy” and it does get annoying. What’s worse is being tall and fat, so whenever people talk about your size or say you are big you aren’t sure whether they mean your height or weight.
As for all the skinnies out there, shut up. Woo hoo look at me I can run 12 miles without even sweating. Go get hit by a bus. Everyone knows that when the second ice age comes, the chubbies are going to rule the world because all the skinnies will die out. Survival of the fittest, indeed.
being fat is GOOD
stand up for yourself
Josh, I completely agree with your height/weight comment. I’m 6’5″ and at my largest was 317lbs. I constantly had the ‘Big Guy Slap on the Back’ greeting. It’s not so much the big guy comment (I’m big, I could weigh 200lbs and I’d still be big) it’s the slapping I dislike. Back the french toast off, man, don’t touch me.
That being said…I’m down to 278 now, and want to go to 250. With my frame that’s as low as I can go…I’ve been down there before and my ribs are clearly visible. At 317, not so much.
on July 19, 2008 at 1:32 am CIARAN wrote:
“FATY”
LOL?
DAM STRATE!
SPEL MUTCH?
YUR DOIN’ IT AWL RONG EEIF SOE!
LMFAO!!!!
This blog is a nice source of entertainment.
And yes, I too am a “biggun'”.
6’1″ 300lbs
I’m happy with my shape. Happy with my weight too.
I prefer it because people tend to not screw with me in my particular size.
And if people do screw with you…. start thinking quicker and fire off sharp witted responses.
Offending non fat person thing: HEY FATTY STOP EATTING SO MUCH!
Content fat person not missing a beat: HEY DON’T BE MAD JUST BECAUSE I CAN AFFORD TO EAT MORE! GET A JOB!
Outwitting a person is so much fun.
I love it when a halfwit resorts to “whatever” or “so”.
It pleases this fat person to see a skinny person have a brain fart. They so don’t expect it.
This was so funny. I genuinly laughed so loud in my office while reading it. I think it is a great attitude for a person to be able to be humerous about being overweight.
I also hate it when people, in a desperate attempted to be funny, call you the opposite. I have a friend at work who calls me Tiny. Yes I know I’m fat, obviously everyone can clearly see you are trying to be ironic by calling me Tiny. I love this site by the way, gives me an odd sense of empowerment!
This was so friggen funny! I read it out loud to my husband and it took forever because my belly was so sore from laughing and I had to wipe away tears.
hahaha… ow, my tummy!
I laughed so hard I wet myself!